"Sigh-ness."

I haven't been -

• studying enough
• working out
• sleeping enough

and my exams are in 3 weeks time. and not to say i have a very free and easy exam schedule unlike last semester where exam paper dates are few days apart. This semester are all back-to-back stuff.

Oh well, joke for the day;

Enjoy :)


The cute things they say to each other

You may not be able to party after marriage if your wife is like this one........... :)

Newlyweds This couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out into town and party, so he says to his new wife: Honey, I'll be right back...

Where are you going coochi cooh...? Asks the wife. I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer.

The wife puts her hands on her hips and says to him: You want a beer my love...? Then she opens the door to the refrigerator and shows him 25 different kinds of beer brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc....

The husband doesn't know what to do, and the only thing that he can think of saying is: Yes, loolie loolie ... but the bar .... you know ...the frozen glass.

He didn't get to finish saying the sentence, when the wife interrupts him by saying: You want a frozen glass puppy face...? She takes out of the freezer a huge beer mug so frozen that the wife was getting the chills from holding it.

The husband looking a bit pale says: Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar they have those hoer's de devours that are really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK? You want hoer's de devours poochi pooh..? She opens the oven and takes out 15 dishes of different hoer's de devours ...chicken wings, pigs in the blanket, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc...

But sweet honey ... at the bar ... you know ... the swearing, the dirty words and all that...You want dirty words cutie pie...?

HERE, DRINK YOUR FUCKING BEER IN YOUR FUCKING FROZEN GLASS AND EAT YOUR FUCKING SHIT HOER'S DE VOURS, BECAUSE YOU AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE.YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!...


Area 51

You've all heard of the Air Force's ultra-high-security, super-secret base in Nevada, known simply as Area 51?

Well, late one afternoon, the Air Force folks out at Area 51 were very surprised to see a Cessna landing at their secret base, They immediately impounded the aircraft and hauled the pilot into an interrogation room.

The pilot's story was that he took off from Vegas, got lost, and spotted the Base just as he was about to run out of fuel. The Air Force started a full FBI background check on the pilot and held him overnight during the investigation.

By the next day, they were finally convinced that the pilot really was lost and wasn't a spy. They gassed up his airplane, gave him a terrifying"you-did-not-see-a-thing" briefing, complete with threats of spending the rest of his life in prison, told him Vegas was that-a-way on such-and-such a heading, and sent him on his way.

The next day, to the total disbelief of the Air Force, the same Cessna showed up again. Once again, the MP's surrounded the plane... only this time there were two people in the plane.

The same pilot jumped out and said,Do anything you want to me, lock me up, throw away the key, ANYTHING you want! But my wife is in the plane with me and you have GOT to tell her where I was last night!



Red and Shiny

The teacher, in an attempt to stimulate their minds, asked the class the following question, "What is bright red and shiny?" Little Johnny jumped up and shouted, " A fire engine !!!!??? "No! No!" said the teacher," But I like the way you think.. Anyone else?" Little Susan replied that it was an apple and the teacher was happy except Johnny of course.. Anyway, Little Johnny asked the teacher if he can ask a question to which she nodded OK. "What is long, hard, rounded and has hair at one end?"

"JOHNNY!!!" she screamed, "WE'LL HAVE NONE OF THAT TALK HERE..." Johnny replied, "No, it's a toothbrush, but I like the way you think"..



- take care and God bless, everyone.

- jW's.