"Not Funny"

Found this at the flooble chatterbox this morning;

<tsencai>: i wish i had a girlfriend
Sat, Jan 28 2006 (11:02:43 am) IP: 218.111.211.*

that's not funny. stop it. So pls, even if the CNY boredom has gotten into you or you have nothing else better to do, do not spam on the chatterbox.

"Insta-Post"

"Insta-Post"


Click on this --> insta-blog-post

Man, talk bout cheating.

"Yet Another"

"Yet Another"

Greetings,

Ok, i'll just keep an update on what happened yesterday. Went for Patrick's farewell dinner. We were to eat at Khuntai (the Thai restaurant at Asia Kafe) but we decided to meet up earlier so that we can go for a session @ Inferno. So...I had to pick up Aaron and ChoongKhin first. I left my house at 5.15pm or so...and on the way, i encountered this.......

Freaking JAM!!!! Argh what could take maybe 15 minutes to pick them both up took me half an hour in this situatioN! Blardy jam. ARgh..after picking them up...the horror ain't over yet.

On the way, radio reports that directly after the toll after the NKVE highway, there is a bumper-to-bumper jam. Crap, there's where we're headed. Subang ain't the best place to go in the evening. I learned my lesson o_O'

After a gruelling half an hour on the road, we finally made it to Inferno at somewhere round 7pm or so. Went in, saw them in the middle of a DotA game. Also, Joe was also in the middle of trying to persuade us to go to Telok Gong in Klang to eat seafood o_O hmmm....

So in the end, we headed for Telok Gong. haha..hmm..seafood does sound rather mouth watering.. ehehe..So it was just Joe, Patrick, Kwee, Aaron, ChoongKhin and I heading to Telok Gong at the moment. We were to meet the Klang gang there.

Upon reaching there, we saw Ghee waiting for us. ChorYeow and KokPin would be late cause KokPin gotta wait for CY to get out of work. So we ordered first :D

This is what we ordered. There's more to it but the camera couldn't fit everything into one frame :]

This' what we had for the night. Good stuff. Really.

After dinner, like sampah masyarakat most of us are, we headed to Silva at SS15 for a drink because.....

we had no other better way of spending the rest of the night o_O haha it figures...sampah people..

At Silva...

Out of boredom....

This is my teh-ais i ordered..

This is i-forgot-whose teh tarik...

hehs...

After taht we went home. End of the day. Hahz. don't really know what to write about. I'm not really a good blogger after all. Just wanna keep track of the stuff i do :)

Oh yea..

blessings, tsencai.

"Nobody's World"

"Nobody's World"

Screw the world. Goodbye.

-tsencai.

"Nobody's Business"

"Nobody's Business"

Hullo reader(s),

I haven't been doing much update lately. Coz nothing much happened lately! Well yea, what can i do...

Anyways, today i was at 1u and finally got what i wanted :) hehe..had my lunch there too..

then after that..i went home loh..then proceeded to rot for the rest of the day, till now...sitting in front of my pc..typing this very sentence.. ZzZzZ

haihs at the moment my life's really boring...and i really think i'm wasting myself out. Wait......

Not at the moment...my life's REALLY BORING leh! and really kind of suck actually...

Everyday ppl go out..enjoy night life..etc etc...me leh..i stay at home lohh...blog summore loh.. like some freaking geek. Everyday, i see/read/get to know bout people as old as i am (or maybe a year older)_, who appear in ads, who are models, teachers, rockstars, etc etc (and even an Emcee at night clubs??)

gee..i wonder would it feel to be one. Everyday you're out. You get to know people... hmm......guess i'll never get a taste @ popularity.

-blessings

-tsencai.

"Internet - The Brawl Hall"

"Internet - The Brawl Hall"


Yo,

Alright, i just had a thought on this. I got this friend, who got this friend, who both happens to be bloggers too, and well, this friend's friend of mine, just experienced an attack of a flamer.

Flamer? Whazzatt??? o_O

Well, in case for those who don't know, flaming is the act of posting messages that are deliberately hostile and insulting, usually in the social context of a discussion board, a forum, or even a blog (on the Internet, of course).

Ok, good. Now y'know what a flamer is. Cool :]

Hoh-kay..well i'm sure us internet users have been flamed at least ONCE before. It doesn't have to be on discussion boards. It could be on online chatting, online games (DotA can be a very hostile activity...yes it can) and etc etc etc bla bla bla the list goes no......zZzZzZ

Well so happens this friend's friend (ok, lets label her Kawan) of mine got flamed on HER blog, just because Kawan was accused of writing entries that resembles and imitates a famous blogger's one. O_o????

Wata-dilleee? -.-'

Yea, and this famous blogger, i believe, HER name is Joyce (?)

(aye? siapa tu? I only tau KennySia)

Damn. Now that really sucks. Nampaknya Kawan kena lawan. Heck this kawan might not even know who this Joyce is..and now kawan's blog is like some freakin' warzone. Adui...

All the fuss over some famous blogger? Geez...get a life, wei.

Coz y'see.......

Flaming is an act of a COWARD.

Well, yea sure. You go on around cursing/scolding/insulting anybody w/ the safe feeling that nobody's ever gonna really know who you are, right? Your identity is kept secret, and nobody knows your exact location. Voila, the elements of an ultimate weapon (in general-lah, at least).

Flamers will never reveal their identity. That's because they're afraid. Scared. Yea, they suck. I hate flamers too.

I mean, c'mon lah. Get a life. Too afraid to face the person in reality? So as an alternative flamers roam around the cyberspace in search of a worthy adversary (?).

Y'know wat.

I've read Kawan's blog. I've seen the warzone.

In conclusion, the flamer's a NOOB!!! HAHA...and so are the defenders :P (oi jk ar...dun cari pasal dengan saya)

Oi, lu tahu bagaimana flame ah?

You call that flaming?

For today, it gives me great pleasure to share with you all what I think, at least, the greatest piece of essay that epitomizes the potential usage of skilled grammar and creativity combined. Once again, I did this all for your reading pleasure :) Cheers.

Before I start, just so y'know im no coward. My name is Liew :) and this is directed to all flamers/troublemakers alike. Flame me if you wish.

THE ULTIMATE FLAME

You swine. You vulgar little maggot. Don't you know that you are pathetic? You worthless bag of filth. As we say, I'll bet you couldn't pour piss out of a boot with instructions on the heel. You are a canker. A sore that won't go away. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you.

You are a fiend and a coward, and you have bad breath. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you. You are a bloody nardless newbie twit protohominid chromosomally aberrant caricature of a coprophagic cloacal parasitic pond scum and I wish you would go away.

You're a putrescence mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon.

You are a bleating fool, a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into this world. An insensate, blinking calf, meaningful to nobody, abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts who sired you and then killed themselves in recognition of what they had done.

I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you smell?

If you aren't an idiot, you made a world-class effort at simulating one.You snail-skulled little rabbit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs.

You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You're a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won't have sex with you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot.

And what meaning do you expect your delusionally self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with us? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake?

You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling meatslapper.On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.

I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid. Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I'm sorry. I can't go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don't have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of this drivel. Duh.

P.S.: You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful, cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable, belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal, fascistic, bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic, brain-damaged, imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame, self-righteous, byzantine, conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent, libelous, bilious, splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking, devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic, fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased, suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim, crazy, weird, dystopic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim, unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive, mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive, abusive, socially-retarded, puerile, clueless, and generally Not Good.

I Hope This Helps...

HAHA nah i didn't make that up. I found it on the net. But hey, i think i could do a job just as good as that ;)

hehe...oh yea, let's keep the Internet angry :]

-blessings.

-tsencai.

"My Name is L i e W"

"My Name is L i e W"



Hullo,

ok... haven't been doing much today. Spent my morning + early noon @ California Fitness Mid Valley. Interesting ye? :D Well i don't really think so...

y'see...

i think i've got con-ed. Sort of.


Yea, for those who don't know, California Fitness is a gym. Just opened @ MidValley, California Fitness is also well-knowned for Jackie Chan as their spokesperson..

Ok now, so how'd i get conned by a fitness centre?

Well it started back at Taylors, somewhere near Inferno...2 days ago.


Hoh-kay,

I was at Inferno (an internet kafe) @ Subang playing a round of DotA (need i explain what's DotA?) w/ some friends of mine, and some also not really friends of mine o_O

So after a round, we all headed home. On the way home, i encountered this ladee.

She introduces herself as LIM. And she happens to be a salesperson representing California Fitness selling some promotion stuff. Uh-huh.

So yea, she explained that she was going around selling and promoting these promotion packages which contain coupons, giving away free trial membership for 30-days, discounts on full-time membership, and some free fitness evaluation stuff O_o? (whatever that is).

Not only that, w/ the promotion package, i can even get a freebie! Yea, everybody loves a freebie. I have a choice of either getting a free California Fitness tower or a stainless steel water bottle both worth RM70 on my first visit. Hmm..so i thought it's not bad.

The catch - the entire promotion ends on June 2006, and the promotion package is actually NOT FREE. It's selling for RM25.

But hey, hmm...

Coupons having 2 sets of each, free one month membership trial (well not so free afterall), and a free towel/water bottle on my first visit...

It doesn't sound so bad afterall :] So what the heck, i bought it. Nothing to lose...at least so that's what i thought...

This is what the package looks like. It's basically a cardboard w/ tear-ready coupons inside.

Oh yea, an attractive cover case...

The inside of the package. Click for a bigger preview.

The coupons have a duplicate set. So yea, i can bring somebody along too.

So after the transaction have been finalised, i went home happily, w/ lots of hope that i won't rot at home for the rest of the days before university starts.

So today comes...

I head over to MidValley in the late morning around 11.00am or so. Went there, got to the gym and i met up w/ this lady.

So i showed here the promotion coupons, and the first thing she asked:

"How old are you?"

So i said, "19 this year. 18 going on 19 :)"

Then she asked, "Oh i see. When is you're birthday?"

.... "25th May"

"Oh i'm sorry. Y'see the promotion is only opened to people aging 19 and above. So i can't let you use the coupons...at least for now. You gotta wait for your birthday when you really turn 19 :) But since you're here, i'll let you in lah. But only for today, after that tak boleh ya?"

"........."

Conned. The salesperson didn't mentioned anything bout the age. So does the coupons. There weren't anything that says bout age limits.

This is horribly wrong. Imagine this. Their salespersons are going around selling their stuff around Taylors College. Yes, majority of the students are 17 going on 18. So what if they got sold to these stuff? They won't have any chance to use it at all. The promotion ends on June 2006. Cheats.

Lucky i'll be 19 this year. So i can't use it till mid year only :(

Sighs. I'm so stewpid.

Guess i'm not so street smart after all.

-blessings.

-tsencai.

:)

"China + English = -.-; "

"China + English = -.-; "

Hah! This is friggin' hilarious. I received this recently in my email, somewhat a forwarded message that i don't get everyday :/

Enjoy :]

Note : Click on the image for a larger preview.

I can't believe how chinese can be translated to such a degree.

Haha..ridiculous eh.

-blessings.

-tsencai.

"Being Special :)"

"Being Special :)"

Hullo reader(s),

I've been trudging through old photos mine taken back way back during the first semester of college days and...........

i found this...

My mum always told me that i was special :]

:)

-blessings.

-tsencai.

"Nobody"

"Nobody"

Ok, i wonder why people complain bout their lives? I know people who go clubbing, come home in the next morning, treat their home like a hotel, and they say, "I hate my parents; they don't give me enough freedom and bla bla bla" and in the end they say "I hate my life."

Pls. Let me tell you reader(s) something, alright?

My name is Joshua Liew Tsen Cai. I am 18 years old, going on 19 this year. I still have a CURFEW.

Yes. I still have a curfew. Go on. Laugh. I've even heard somebody said, "I thought guys don't have a CURFEW". Heck, even some girls don't even have a curfew. They can go out, return to their homes the next morning, and their parents won't even realize that their out -.-;

So, whats that compared to me? I'm a momma's boy? Or i'm just a plain wuss?

So, telling you how much of a loser i am, pls stop complaining so much. Live your life. Your parents have given enough freedom to you.

Couples. They always seem very happy together, don't they? Yes they do. But nothing lasts forever. Nothing.

They might look happy together, but it's more than meets the eye. They look happy, but they might NOT be. They will be once when one half of the couple does not agree w/ the other half about something.

Then, they begin complaining bout each other behind their respective backs. To their friends. Ok..thats cool. One has to let some out, right? Share the problem...gain opinions..stuff like that. Right...

and so...then they might suddenly talk bout their past..their ex-s in particular. One said he/she has 4...another said 2...another said 17 @)(#*@)#*@#*@ OMG you're good man. Well, not so good in the claimer's opinion however, said that they weren't proud or happy bout their past.

Well of course you ain't proud of it..it's a sad thing right? Hearts broken, feelings hurt etc etc...

BUT

One thing i really don't like hearing from them is this -

I wish i never was like that.

......

NEVER. EVER.

TELL ME THAT.

I'm sure you were happy during those times. ONly the problems you faced during the course of the relationships brought things down. The problems brought YOU down. You/your partner couldn't handle it. So things just went bad and both of you broke up. GG.

Well at least you had fun. You were able to get a partner and i'm sure both of you had fun during courtship and the relationship. Thats cool.

But NEVER, EVER, regret that.

Things like these happen in our age. It doesn't really last unless you're really commited. And yes, staying and maintaining one takes ALOT of commitment.

Being in love is fun. It sounds fun. It IS really fun. But the results, might not be fun.

So please, if you think you're the kind that can't really handle stress/problems/pressure, don't get into one. I'm not really discouraging or anything but..

some people can be really.....persistent. They know it. They forsee it. They have exprienced it.

Yet they still get involved. Then in the future, more complains. I don't get it. If it's too much. Why not just call it quits?

Or another solution.

Get through with things. PLS. You're hurting not only yourself but somebody else too when breaking up. If you think its just too painful for you, think bout the other party.

Lu ingat apa? your boyfriend/girlfriend's a stone ah?

And then they say; geting into a relationship, breaking up, getting into another one..etc etc....bla bla blaa...

A buddy of mine told me this before in EXACT words..."Pls man. take it from me lar...don't be a snaker. Snaker's no good wan ah..Snaker's life painful wan ah..and also dangerous lorr...i wish i didnt' have any girlfriend larr..."

Snaker : A term used for a guy who courts a female. This term is mainly used in DJ grounds. Hence the verb "Snaking". Snaking would then mean courting.

Ok. Let me tell you something, ok?

My name is Joshua Liew Tsen Cai. I'm 18 years old, going 19 this year. I've been single all my life. and how have i been spending it?

I spent most of my life devoted to computer games, tv, food etc etc. Everyday (now at least) i sleep at 2-3am+...starring down at my monitor, chatting...blogging...dota-ing..bla bla blaa.....for the ENTIRE DAY.

THAT'S A FREAKING GEEK MAN. I coop myself up in my room w/ a mother as a prison warden at home. I hardly go out. In fact, i think i could use the word never.

You think it's fun? I'd think your life is much better than me. The things i would actually give up to devote myself to a partner (ok i think i sound desperate here, i'll stop now) but i CAN'T. Consider yourself blessed.

Pls, never regret what you have done. Having a partner is cool. You just gotta know your limits. You can stay at home, knowing someone out there cares for you. Someone who constantly (ok mebbe not constantly, but its good enough for a word, right) thinks bout you.

So pls..never ever say that you regret being in a relationship. There are many single ppl out there who wish to live a life like yours.

Having a partner. Some ppl make it look/sound so easy.

Though i think whatever i've typed so far might be bullshit or what-so-ever, i hope i can make myself clear enough.

Pls..do...NOT.....EVER.....TELL ME...

Your life sucks.

Cause you can never compare it w/ mine.

Ok, i maybe i think i might present myself in a desperate status w/ this entry. But just so you reader(s) out there know, i'm quite happy w/ my life :]

-Loads of blessings.

-tsencai.

"Untouchable"

"Untouchable"


Greetings reader(s),

Hey, honestly, tell me. How'd you feel if, you;

• saw something at a shop that you really want
• you need it ?
• your financial capabilities allow you to afford it ;)
• though its expensive :)
• but your mom/dad doesn't allow you to have it cause it was simply too expensive and worth the buy :(

Argh.....that's exactly how i feel now! i won't tell what it really is, but its a piece of garment thats in Mid Valley :S and the only thing i fear is that the piece of garment might have a new owner before me! o_O aisey..

and my mum won't let me get it cause it was simply too expensive for its worth :S

aye do i sound gay? i think i do. A guy fussing over a piece of garment he wants..aikz..damn.

but what the heck. A guy have HIS set of WANTS right? ;)

-blessings.

-tsencai.

"@(#*&)&@#"

"@(#*&)&@#"


ARgghh......holidays so freaking siennn...everyday sleep 2-3am..everyday wake up 11-12pm -.-; waste time-nya...and in 2 weeks time Chinese New Year holidays are gonna begin... arghh everyday i feel so useless..lonely. Heck i haven't even enrol myself in any university yet! hopefully i can enrol tmr (today actually, since this entry is made in 2am+).

Blah......i never felt so useless + lonely.

anyway nothing much happened today..stayed at home whole day..as usual...as always -.-;








-blessings.


-tsencai.

"Relations"

"Relations"

Greetings,

Today John finally made his return from JB. He had no choice :P he has to come and retrieve his remaining stuff in Joe's house. Haha...he couldn't bring them all back to his home all in one shot. But anyways, it was good to see him again. Welcome back, John :]

Ok..one more issue to attend to. Regarding the Penang trip, it has been finalised that it has been CANCELED. Yeap. Too much complications involved.

Firstly, Joe can't make it in the end. His parent's aren't happy bout the trip + sounding by his dad cause he's been there twice already, and going there again would make it his third trip there. Secondly, Aaron can't make it either. His parents didn't grant permission..

and as for me...my mum wasn't so keen on the idea either. So i guess its off.

Apologies to all, but don't worry, at this very moment, another plan is about to crack up :) ...most probably a bbq party @ Jerry's house again.

Arrghhh..my mum can really tick me off sometimes...

People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered,

i get accused of selfish,ulterior motives,

i get take advantaged of , being cheated.

Well..

I'd forgive them anyway.
I'd be kind anyway.

I'd be honest and frank anyway.

Cause you see,

in the final analysis,

it is between me and God,

it was never between me and them people....

:)

blessings,

-tsencai.

"Being Direct but Indirectly"

"Being Direct but Indirectly"

Ok, what do you get if you get a China fella translating chinese directly into English?

Carefully fall into the river? Wow, now you got people encouraging you to get into the river for a swim.

Ok i guess sometimes we get that "raging hormones" bit BUT.......

....this is ridiculous.

Sometimes when delivering a message or an instruction to someone, one has to assume that the recipient of the message doesn't know much or nothing at all....

Alright...so they have every single instruction posted on how to cross a road with the help of a traffic light.

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." -Albert Einstein

Anyways...today ShuWen left for Perth in the morning. I'm guessing her flight is at 9.00am, i think. Poor Joe, i wonder how's he coping up now.

Tomorrow i'm paying Sunway campus one more visit before i make my final decision on which uni. to enrol in.

Hope that covers it up.

Btw...a shout-out to K3-ians; How bout that trip? :]

-tsencai.

Out.

"Enough"

"Enough"

Pictures paint a thousand words.

I made my statement.

:]

"Caption This"

"Caption This"

Greetings reader(s),

While surfing the net this post sort of caught my eye.Thought it was quite funny and also ridiculous...

enjoy :)



Dating Cultures


AMERICAN WOMEN

First date: You get to kiss her goodnight.
Second date: You get to grope all over and make out.
Third date: You get to have sex in the missionary position. Then you promise to marry her but will probably abandon the idea.


JAPANESE WOMEN

First date: She's shy, so you don't get to kiss her at all.
Second date: She'll take a bath in front of you and let you smell her panties.
Third date: You get to have kinky sex with her. Then she'll bid you sayonara, as that was her last fling as she's getting married to a Japanese man tomorrow.


MALAY WOMEN

First date: You get to touch that big breast of hers.
Second date: You get to home base with her.
Third date: You have to promise her that you are going to get circumcised. Then you will marry her and find out that you have to support her whole family. The only consolation is that you get to repeat the procedure three more times as allowed under Islamic law!


CHINESE WOMEN

First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.
Second date: You buy her an even more expensive dinner but nothing happens too.
Third date: You have already realized that nothing's going to happen.


INDIAN WOMEN

First date: You meet her parents.
Second date: The date is set for the wedding.
Third date: It's your wedding night!



Ok, enough of those nonsense. Time for an original post.

Caption thiS!

-tsencai.

Out.

"The Eldest 19"

"The Eldest 19"

2nd January 1987;

Somewhere in Malaysia: a terrible creature was born into this world, one prophecized to bring upon the destruction and devastation of the human race. Born with strikingly good looks, the brain with extreme intelligence but with abnormally large(?) obvious nips, this "abomination" has terrorized WOMEN and men for 18 years and is still on the loose. If you ever encounter a red kelisa with licence no.6076, run for your life and don't ever look back.









































Happy Belated Birthday,

Mr. Aaron Chen Yit Ming.


:]

@ Souled Out.

Your K3 Buddy for the year 2005,

With lots of blessings,

tsencai.

:]

Out.

"Hope Interrupted"

"Hope Interrupted"

Greetings reader(s),

S'been a few days since my last entry. My modem died. Again. o_O

Anyway i came across this story just this afternoon while browsing the net; a story of a mother and her daughter. This story of takes on a wonderful daughter who many years ago got involved in a very violent car accident which left her unable to speak.

It's kinda long story, so please, do not close this window, take yer time, and enjoy the story :)




Hope Interrupted (Story point of view as in from Linda, the mother)

It was the day after Christmas and my mom and I had spent the day shopping with baby Laura in tow and now we were heading home for dinner.

As I drove down the highway, I peeked in the rear view mirror and into the happy face of Laura, my 18-month old baby, snuggled safely in her car seat. I smiled. "Honey, we'll be at Grandma's house soon."

Suddenly, taillights blinked red just ahead. My foot pressed the brakes and the car lurched, skidding into the path of an oncoming minivan. My mother's screams pierced the air as I fought the car for control. The minivan tried to serve out of our path, but to no avail. Our car lunged toward it at sixty-miles-per-hour.

The thundering impact exploded around me. When I opened my eyes, I gasped, surprised to be alive. I turned to mom. She looked okay. But then I heard it.

Silence.

Laura should be crying. Why wasn't my baby crying?

I turned and looked into the backseat. But the backseat had been ripped off the car.

Clawing my way out of the wreckage, I found my baby. Laura was still sitting in her car seat, dazed and still, in the middle of the freeway.

I knelt in the mud beside her and cried out to God, but as I prayed, I sensed our world was forever changed.

Once at the hospital, I pushed open a heavy emergency room door and crawled on hands and knees to the window that overlooked the doctors' valiant fight for Laura's life.

There I watched, wept, and prayed until I was finally discovered by a passing nurse. She ushered me back into the waiting room and into the arms of my husband, Paul, who had just arrived.

"Is Laura going to be okay?" he asked."I don't know. I, I think she has a fractured skull." I cried.

That evening we were moved to ICU where Laura quaked with seizures. But after the surgeries to relieve the building pressure in her brain, Laura remained hooked to life support, unconscious.

I kept my daily vigil by the still body of my child for weeks. One day, one of Laura's doctors dropped by to see her.

"There's still no change," he said. "You might as well…"

I felt startled. I knew what he wanted to say. He wanted to tell me to end my baby's life!

"But," I argued, "Laura's brain waves are active. She's not dead."

The doctor stared at me and tried to say more, but as he faced my hope, he fell mute and slowly turned and walked away.

In the weeks, then months that followed, I clung to my hope as well as my faith in God. When Paul and I were able to fly Laura from Texas to another hospital closer to our home in Colorado, I knew things would be different.

Two weeks later, the new hospital staff finished their evaluation of Laura and called a meeting. "My husband's out of town today," I explained to the doctors. "Could we postpone this meeting until he arrives tomorrow?"

"No need to wait," the doctors explained. "You already know what we're going to say."

I smiled. I did know. They were going to tell me of the therapy treatment they use to coax children like Laura from their comas!

But once the meeting started, how stunned I was when one, by one, twenty-four healthcare professionals encircled me to pronounce their verdicts.

"Your daughter is not in coma. She's in a vegetative state."

"She'll never wake up."

"She's a vegetable."

"There's no hope."

"No hope..."

"No hope..."

I sat stoic, bent on gleaning information before my threatening-tears stopped the meeting. But though I was a brave actress, I felt numb, violated, shocked. Later that night I sat in the stillness of my daughter's hospital room, holding her hand, watching for signs of life. As I studied her, Laura looked as if her dark lashes would flutter open and she would sit up, ending our almost two-month-long nightmare.

How I longed to hear Laura's giggle as she snuggled with her silky hair against my cheek while I read to her from one of her favorite books.

Impulsively, I leaned over and kissed her cherubic face. "Honey, it's Mommy. I love you...I know you're in there. I'm waiting...."The words caught in my throat. The mechanical breathing of her respirator jarred my thoughts. A strange mood of uncertainty settled over me. I looked at the child I had fought and prayed so hard to keep. She's really in there, isn't she?

I stood up, trying to shake the doubt that had suddenly caught me off guard. Noticing my watch read 11 p.m., I decided to get ready for bed. Because Paul was still out of town, I wouldn't drive home, but would sleep over in Laura's room.

Flipping off the light, I shut the door. The nurses had already completed their evening rounds. It would be hours before anyone would check on us. I felt alone, too alone. I popped two extra-strength pain relievers and sat the bottle on a nearby tray table beside my glass of water. What if the doctors are right-and Laura never wakes up? I thought as I spread a blanket in the window seat.

Fluffing my pillow, I wondered about God. Maybe He's abandoned us. Maybe He isn't going to answer my prayers.

This new thought punctured my tired spirit. Just who am I trying to fool? I questioned. I need to face facts, Laura will never awaken. She'll live the rest of her life, as a vegetable, hooked to life support.

I tried to stifle the emotions that began to boil as Laura's respirator mocked, no-hope, no-hope, no-hope. My chest constricted as I gasped for air. Everything seemed so different, so pointless. Laura, I decided, would be better off if she were...to die. After all, I concluded, I couldn't allow her to live in this suspended state of life, could I?

A plan rose from my grief. I couldn't bear to ask the Doctors to take my child off life support after I'd prevented this action once before. But now, I realized Laura's smile would never return. My dreams for her life were dashed. And God? He had been as silent as Laura's stilled voice.

Perhaps God's silence meant I needed to take matters into my own hands. Perhaps it was up to me to end this horrible suffering.

I can kill Laura without the doctor's help, I reasoned. I can turn off the alarms and unplug the vent from the wall. It would be so simple, except...except, I wondered, if I kill my daughter, how could I live with myself? How could I face Paul or my parents?

The moonlight reflected on my bottle of pain killers. If I swallowed them...no one would find us until morning...Laura and I could...escape...this living hell... Together.

Just as my plan seemed like the only solution, I found my hand resting on my belly. My hidden child was only two weeks old, but I knew he was there.

My thoughts slowly cleared. How could I kill myself? How could I kill Laura? A new life was growing inside of me. A life that had the right to live!

My reasoning returned, Lord, I'm willing to wait-despite the pain and the cost. I'm willing to wait on You. That night I cried myself to sleep, terrified of the future and terrified of the murders I had almost committed.

But despite my night of terror followed by my surrender to God, Laura remained unchanged. As she continued to sleep, my girth grow. Nine months later, I held my newborn son, Jimmy in my arms. Once home from the hospital, it was his cries that finally awoke Laura from her coma!

Though Laura returned to us paralyzed and on life support, she is a happy child, full of understanding and joy. Though unable to speak, Laura is able to silently communicate her wishes and feelings through tongue-signals and facial expressions. Now seventeen-years-old, Laura beams with joy, laughing at our jokes and enjoying the world around her.

But some would question her right to live, asking if her life was truly viable. It's then I think back at the charge Jesus repeatedly gave in his earthly ministry. He charged us "To love the Lord with all our heart, and to love our neighbor as ourselves."


Laura has taught her family how to love. When I see Paul's love for his daughter and see Laura's little brother, now a teen, hug his sister and tell her how much he loves her, I'm so proud.

Then, when I look into Laura's innocent, joyous eyes, I can see that despite her handicaps, Laura loves her Lord and those He has put into her life more purely than anyone I know. Her life is viable indeed.

Your life is not only viable, it's valuable too. You have a purpose. You may be tired and weary, but did you know that the Bible says, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (from New International Version)

I have learned to give my burdens to God, as my life hasn't been so grand either. I can honestly say that despite my troubles, I have real peace and real joy. So can you. Not only give your troubles to God, through His son Jesus, give Him your sins as well as your life.

Love you,
Linda




Thoughts on this: Hang in there, keep doing the next thing. I'm not promising that you will not have losses, but keep praying, seeking God, and His direction. Keep your head high in this storm and one day, it will pass. The sun will shine again. And this dark period of your life will be behind you. There is hope.


Jeremiah 29: 11 - 13 says "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord,...plans to give you hope and a future.... You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."


Keep seeking, keep walking, and God will see you through this.


Story acquired from www.righttotheheart.com








Blessings,


-tsencai.


:)

"Greetings 2006"

"Greetings 2006"

Greetings and a very Happy Blessed New Year to everyone reading this post! :)

Went to Ikano Power Centre w/ Fabian, Mango, ZiaWen and ChewLing to celebrate NewYear's Eve 2006...

Hmm..met alot of other DJ-ians there as well. So overall, quite a fun outing :)

Anyway here are some random pics of fireworks @ from the viewpoint of the crowd @ Ikano

Sigh i know its not much, but i haven't been posting any photos lately.. so um...here's my contribution :)















-tsencai.

Out.



Once again, Happy New Year everyone :]