"Internet - The Brawl Hall"

"Internet - The Brawl Hall"


Yo,

Alright, i just had a thought on this. I got this friend, who got this friend, who both happens to be bloggers too, and well, this friend's friend of mine, just experienced an attack of a flamer.

Flamer? Whazzatt??? o_O

Well, in case for those who don't know, flaming is the act of posting messages that are deliberately hostile and insulting, usually in the social context of a discussion board, a forum, or even a blog (on the Internet, of course).

Ok, good. Now y'know what a flamer is. Cool :]

Hoh-kay..well i'm sure us internet users have been flamed at least ONCE before. It doesn't have to be on discussion boards. It could be on online chatting, online games (DotA can be a very hostile activity...yes it can) and etc etc etc bla bla bla the list goes no......zZzZzZ

Well so happens this friend's friend (ok, lets label her Kawan) of mine got flamed on HER blog, just because Kawan was accused of writing entries that resembles and imitates a famous blogger's one. O_o????

Wata-dilleee? -.-'

Yea, and this famous blogger, i believe, HER name is Joyce (?)

(aye? siapa tu? I only tau KennySia)

Damn. Now that really sucks. Nampaknya Kawan kena lawan. Heck this kawan might not even know who this Joyce is..and now kawan's blog is like some freakin' warzone. Adui...

All the fuss over some famous blogger? Geez...get a life, wei.

Coz y'see.......

Flaming is an act of a COWARD.

Well, yea sure. You go on around cursing/scolding/insulting anybody w/ the safe feeling that nobody's ever gonna really know who you are, right? Your identity is kept secret, and nobody knows your exact location. Voila, the elements of an ultimate weapon (in general-lah, at least).

Flamers will never reveal their identity. That's because they're afraid. Scared. Yea, they suck. I hate flamers too.

I mean, c'mon lah. Get a life. Too afraid to face the person in reality? So as an alternative flamers roam around the cyberspace in search of a worthy adversary (?).

Y'know wat.

I've read Kawan's blog. I've seen the warzone.

In conclusion, the flamer's a NOOB!!! HAHA...and so are the defenders :P (oi jk ar...dun cari pasal dengan saya)

Oi, lu tahu bagaimana flame ah?

You call that flaming?

For today, it gives me great pleasure to share with you all what I think, at least, the greatest piece of essay that epitomizes the potential usage of skilled grammar and creativity combined. Once again, I did this all for your reading pleasure :) Cheers.

Before I start, just so y'know im no coward. My name is Liew :) and this is directed to all flamers/troublemakers alike. Flame me if you wish.

THE ULTIMATE FLAME

You swine. You vulgar little maggot. Don't you know that you are pathetic? You worthless bag of filth. As we say, I'll bet you couldn't pour piss out of a boot with instructions on the heel. You are a canker. A sore that won't go away. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you.

You are a fiend and a coward, and you have bad breath. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you. You are a bloody nardless newbie twit protohominid chromosomally aberrant caricature of a coprophagic cloacal parasitic pond scum and I wish you would go away.

You're a putrescence mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon.

You are a bleating fool, a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into this world. An insensate, blinking calf, meaningful to nobody, abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts who sired you and then killed themselves in recognition of what they had done.

I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you smell?

If you aren't an idiot, you made a world-class effort at simulating one.You snail-skulled little rabbit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs.

You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You're a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won't have sex with you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot.

And what meaning do you expect your delusionally self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with us? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake?

You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling meatslapper.On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.

I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid. Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I'm sorry. I can't go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don't have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of this drivel. Duh.

P.S.: You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful, cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable, belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal, fascistic, bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic, brain-damaged, imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame, self-righteous, byzantine, conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent, libelous, bilious, splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking, devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic, fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased, suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim, crazy, weird, dystopic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim, unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive, mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive, abusive, socially-retarded, puerile, clueless, and generally Not Good.

I Hope This Helps...

HAHA nah i didn't make that up. I found it on the net. But hey, i think i could do a job just as good as that ;)

hehe...oh yea, let's keep the Internet angry :]

-blessings.

-tsencai.